I feel overwhelmed with self-love. What is better than self-love that can help you find peace and accept who you really are?

In February, love is all around. You can see hearts on store windows, social media filled with big love messages, and a lot of talk about self-love.

Self-love is a great idea, but it can sometimes feel superficial or even fake. This can make you feel overwhelmed when trying to practice self-love.

The pressure of trying to love yourself

Many women feel pressure from the constant reminders to “love yourself.” This can make them feel inadequate or create stress to reach an ideal idea of self-care.

As a yoga and mindfulness mentor for empowered women, I’ve noticed that people often use the term “self-love” too much. This focus can overlook the deeper, more meaningful work of taking care of ourselves. 

Instead of seeing love as the goal, we should shift our attention to self-compassion. This approach invites us to be present, gentle, and accepting of ourselves just as we are.

The Difference Between Self-Compassion and Self-Love

Self-love often feels like a goal, a perfect state of accepting and admiring ourselves. In contrast, self-compassion encourages us to stay with our feelings, even when we struggle or feel unworthy.

Self-compassion means recognising that we are all human and treating ourselves with kindness like we would do for a close friend. It isn’t about trying to fix ourselves but about accepting all parts of our experience.

My self-compassion journey

Years ago, I went to a self-love workshop. I liked the ideas and was thankful to learn how to love myself. I used to talk a lot about self-love and practice it. However, inside, it felt shallow. I felt like I was pretending to love myself, even when I didn’t feel lovable. I acted as if I was beautiful, even though I didn’t believe it.

So, I started to wonder, what could be better than self-love to help me be true to myself? That’s when I learned about “self-compassion.”

That is totally fine if you are a self-loving person, you don’t have to agree with me.

But for me, Self-Compassion is more true to me; also, it has a similar meaning to the Thai word “Jai Dee”, meaning compassion and kindness.

If you want to learn a mindful approach to true self-love (aka self-compassion), join our  Joyful Sundays Club,  where we explore self-compassion with heart-opening yoga poses throughout February. 

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